I`m 17. I`m finishing the 1 course of university. I have to pass 6 exams >< wtf!!! It is all so difficult. I feel myself like I`m on a wrong way, I entered the international relations department, but really I would like to connect my life with music, I used to sing and play the guitar...and all this stuff with studying gives me no time to do what i want. And I`m also worried about my family, mean parents. Dad and mom have problems with work and money, and I feel responsibility for myself that I have a chance to change everything and to succeed in my business. Then, my friends...at school people were friends of mine only for any profit.. that so much irritated me, I have an only best friend (whom i know for 10 years), and at university i met a few friends who are good and they seems to me support me and take care of me, but sometimes i see that i shouldn`t trust them...... everybody tries to survive, to get a better mark, corruption sucks and all the lies of people. So the problem is that I don`t feel myself like a simple teenager, I don`t have free time, I don`t sing and have no inspiration to write songs, I haven`t reliable friends, I have problems in studying... i`m always trying to be the best in it, i don`t wanna buy excellent marks!!! and I `m in depression for 2 years, I cry a lot, I`m emotional like emo, and I don`t like myself cause think that i`m too fat and i hate my face and everything in me, i have never really loved a person, sometimes it seems to me that I love but I can`t understand it what is it to love, but i need smb to fell in love with me first and... oh, it is all so annoying. I `m just exhausted!!! Can`t stand it anymore. kill me please or shoot, doesn`t matter. * I began lately a fan of Supernatural, and think that some people are really demons... >< really! I saw, or am i going insane???? =***
2 years ago, I got accused of something bad. 2 years later, I can't forget it and started shaking and almost crying in double science at school. Now it won't GO AWAY! ! ! SHMPLS!!!